Lift work

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June 24, 2008 by vinylburns

My warm thanks go out to all the ladies, and some of the gentlemen who engaged me in conversation at the Ottawa Dragonboat Festival last weekend.  It was truly a pleasure to meet, play, dance, moonwalk and perform a flying vee scissor kick for you all.  Of course, if any of you have pictures or video of my appearance at the event, I would gladly add them to my collection of delights.

I’m currently residing in one of Ottawas finer establishments, in a spacious, elegant, sweet smelling oasis of a bachelor suite.  Built by one of the finest architects in Canada, the design features a combination of ease of access and fitness facility.  By this, I mean that the elevator only stops at even floors, and that all the rooms are on even floors.  Genius.  Now I know I can leave my colleagues in the lobby, and step into the elevator in a clean sophisticated departure.  Further up inside the backbone of the building, I step out of the elevator, zip my poodle “Rhinestone Vienna” into his jogging sweats, and begin our 8 minute cardio workout as we job up and down the labyrinth of stairs and ladders that will finally lead us to our room.

Ah… The forethought and planning of this design is something I will build into my day to day life…  double the workload and watch the pounds fall away.   Already, I have a few prototype applications under development, including wet dishcloths and ugly ladies.

Ladies.

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Dr Vinyl Burns

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My Management: Kiwi Comedy Ltd.

My DJ Mixes: DJ Vinyl Burns

My Podcast: Jesus It's Early

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